A Special HR-Themed Festivus Airing Of Grievances
Wouldn’t it be funny if you found an employee watching holiday movies in their office? No, of course that wouldn’t be funny! But it does happen. Here at CEDR, we sometimes need to take a break from being the HR Grinch and appreciate the humor. Enjoy this lighthearted, Holiday-themed (and pun-filled!) Corrective Action:
OFFICIAL NOTICE OF CORRECTIVE ACTION
We are taking this time to address your lack of productivity due to watching the movie “Elf” on your phone when you were supposed to be working. This is no laughing matter. Please take time to review this Corrective Action carefully and amend your behavior.
On December 17th, you failed to perform your job duties by choosing instead to watch the beloved holiday movie “Elf,” starring Will Ferrell. As you know, Buddy has a strong work ethic and strives for a sense of accomplishment. You seem to lack these qualities. Moreover, unlike Hermey (from the classic “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer”), you appear disinterested in furthering your education or honing your skills. We hope that you keep the lessons of these heartwarming, family-friendly movies in mind when prioritizing future tasks.
Moreover, your behavior violates company policy. At the risk of being a Grinch, there is a Santa Clause in the employee handbook that prohibits this type of cell phone use during work time. We ask that you keep your phone with your personal belongings, away from your work station – like the Island of Misfit Toys. While you may find this this policy to be Frosty, it’s based out of Love, Actually. Also remember that playing videos on a phone drains the battery, especially when you have it “singing loud for all to hear.” Remember, when phones die, they Die Hard. Finally, leaving your phone out on your desk is a security risk. We don’t want anyone to make off like a Wet Bandit.
You may call me a Scrooge but remember that your Christmas bonus is directly tied to your performance and adherence to policy. Therefore, I don’t want you crying “Bah Humbug,” if you feel like you got coal in your stocking this year. We are not out to be a Bad Santa, but employees on their cell phones make me so upset I could Ralphie. While you may not appreciate these rules or expectations, be forewarned that if you do not follow them – you may be Gonzo.
**The actual corrective coaching documents that the CEDR Solution Center team prepares are unfortunately much more dry than this Seasons Greeting, but they’re also more HR appropriate. Let us know if we can help!